French

Visit a house with an agent, hear its faults described softly, ask the practical questions and keep your cards close.

Weigh a big decision out loud, set one side against the other, and say what really counts.

Make an offer on a house, explain why it is below the asking price, attach a condition and show you can walk away.

Take a counter-offer over the phone, see through a sweetener, and propose meeting halfway.

Ask for a mortgage, talk about years, deposit and rate, and use another bank's offer to get a better one.

Follow the steps of a French house purchase at the notary's, ask about the cooling-off period and the conditions, and count what is left.

Introduce yourselves at a village town hall, ask what needs a permit, and be told how a village works.

Meet a village neighbour, learn the unwritten rules, and be offered the familiar you.

Compare builders' quotes, say why the cheapest isn't the best, and get a discount for giving more work.

Take the keys to a house, say what works and what doesn't, and decide how to get through the first night.

Call a builder about an emergency, push back when he says Monday, and give him a reason to come tonight.

Go back to the town hall about a problem that hasn't gone away, insist politely, and say exactly what you want done.

Be the new people in a village cafe, hear what is said about you, and learn where the news comes from.

Be invited to help with the grape harvest, admit you have never done it, ask what to bring, and say when you will be there.

Take instructions in a vineyard, ask what goes where and for how long, and hear the one rule about lunch.

Sit at a long table after a day's work, take a toast and a tease, turn the story back on the teller, and raise your glass.

Show a building site to worried parents, apologise for the mess, hear what you could have done, and win them over with a view.

Tell a friend you miss them, put distance in perspective, and promise them a room with their name on it.

Get through a French counter with the right documents, hear that one is missing, and find the one that works.

Question an extra on a bill, hear the reason, grant what is fair and refuse what is not, and set the rule for next time.

Be asked to run something for the village, accept on your terms, find out who does what, and hand out the rest.

Manage from forty minutes away, give quick instructions, let people decide for themselves, and say you trust them.

Find out why the stove smokes, learn what is compulsory and who to call, and get a lesson in lighting a fire.

Taste, ask the price, see through the patter, and haggle at a French market with a smile.

Speak at a public meeting, ask leave to object, make one comment and one question, and get a vote.

Handle an emergency at a neighbour's in the middle of the night, ask if anyone is hurt, give orders, and call for help over his objections.

Listen to a grandmother compare then and now, take the judgement when it comes, and accept a decision that was made for you.

Host fourteen people in one kitchen, give everyone a job, take orders from your mother-in-law, and find the right job for a grandmother.

Remember a first meeting, hear a confession that was years late, and answer the question that follows.

Announce an engagement, hear the reactions, say where and when, and let your best friend give herself the job.